:)

la la la laaaaa-ing all day long! when i wake up, when im driving, when im walking to class.

It's like I've been reborn! This book, The Secret, was a reminder of all the good things I have in my life. I'm grateful for myself, for the nature surrounding me, the gorgeous sky outside my window, my family, my friends, my healthy body, laughter, compassion, the feeling of happiness, having experienced love, the ability to create beautiful artwork, a heart full of love, and all the opportunities that are coming my way. I'm grateful for the gift of sight, hearing, touch, and overall the gift to experience the world with all my senses. I feel as if I've spent the 6 months lost because my mind was in a rut. I forgot how to appreciate the privileges, things, and people in my life, as well as myself. The ability to respect and love myself is what I am most grateful for. I'm thankful this book came my way. Life is so beautiful and I'm anticipating all the experiences that I had previously told myself were impossible. I'm going to be the best human being I can possibly be.

Love,

Vivian

miss your love.

Preparing myself everyday for your awaited end. I'm so sorry I got so caught up with life this year that I rarely visited you. I love you so much. xo

Dear Vivian.

it's been a while. Nice to meet you again now that you've grown up.

Love yourself.

Love, Yourself.

red hair day 1

Ouch. Half of me died today. No wonder I was always scared.

These are a few of my favorite things

I like making lists a couple times of year just for fun, I enjoy listing out things I like. So here we go...

long hair, thigh high socks, new makeup with nice packaging, lots of pillows, my boyfriend, sunshine in the wintertime, coats, scarves, pineapple cakes, anything pumpkin, grapes, blueberries, iced smoothes, tea (hot and cold), my lesbian crush on Katy Perry, being active, singing in the shower, singing in the car, BEP's new sound, kittens, puppies, cute little animals, journal blogs, fashion blogs, hand made sketchbooks, hand made gifts, hot chocolate, dark chocolate, dancing in my underwear, pretty bras, saddle bags, black bags, brown bags, colorful bags, short skirts, black jeans, tights, lace up boots, Sara Bareilles, Black Swan, gold things, pretty vintage jewelry, jewelry boxes, shoes, Mark Salling, lace, bohemian prints, karaoke, La Mer watches, photographs, Josh Duhamel, photoshoots, Brooke's VLOG, our jokebook, walking rather than driving, autumn leaves, bringing a bottle of water everywhere, true friends, feeling loved, blahblha.

Love,

Vivian

Winter like Summer

This year around it is a different feeling. The season has arrived and made its present very obvious, but it still feels a bit distant. Nevertheless, the moods are different. The air is lighter, and between the grey skies are streams of light. There is no need for me to clench onto hope, because I am happy, and I am all around in love.

In other words, I couldn't be better.

Yours Truly,

Vivian Shih

Happy Holidays

This War

the warm air has migrated again

and we are once again surrounded by cold

I enjoy talking about the weather.

Self vs. self

Is there an end

to this war?

I can only keep fighting.

(why am i always saying that?)

I don't quite know where I am
nor where I am going
it's foggy here, but
i'll just follow forward
hopefully I'll end up
somewhere with genuine substance

wherrrrrrrre is it locked up?

on a turning point note-to-self in a completely different subject,
focus on color
because it is something I am good at.

Love,
Vivian Shih

It's been a while

The past is behind but so are the ghosts,
some say they haunt and some say they do not believe

I still do not know what to believe

Things are going good and things are running smoothly. I still need to set myself free but I am at last learning how to escape between the bars. There is this thing called confidence that is finally more than just a stranger. College has helped me open up and put me in situations that I would have never imagined myself in. You don't have to say it (ahem "you're growing up") because, smartasses, I already know. Here I am, named at birth as Vivian Shih. V and V are strangers. One is in constant change and one is in a never ending obstacle to better herself. We're polar opposites, but we are ultimately the the same person.



Peace and Love.

To a healthy lifestyle...

Chilliness in the Summertime

I came home for tonight after my plans to work until 4 AM failed because I was ill prepared.
I came home lonely,
and throat clenching,
and feeling lost.
Behind
and stone cold,
and for once, not in a rush.

I am on my period
I hate it

Hes been coming back to memory
I have no idea why

Physically, I am doing well
and eating well
and very proud of myself for taking care of my body

But I am sick of the constant parties
with no goals with substance but intoxication

Where is the love? the love? the love?
Someone feels it missing now

I want it, too, and I just want to feel beautiful.

blahhh can't sleep

ready for stability

The flood is slowly dripping back into my life and I'm just trying to swim myself away.

I'm starting to drown though right now, but I'm working on reaching the surface

Oslo in the Summertime

maybe maybe one day
Dear sunshine,
You are my new best friend
bringing me sunlight and smiles and tanlines and stupid talk
oh hey oh hey ima go and listen to some of this B.I.G

haha but for real, I am loving this sun. Today will be beautiful

I'm going to the beach. Later.

I am enjoying break I am i am I ammm. I don't remember when I started enjoying the sun, but I love it now. A day spent outdoors is a day unwasted.

Today was a day for myself. I went swimming, finished making my sketchbook, started a painting, and finished a drawing.

PS: I started a new blog for my work. Yes. . . I did it. Feel free to check it out (vivscious).

PPS: There is good in everyone, I know it, but sometimes my total faith in this screws me over.

Back on ground

I remember now. This one thing that I love to do is for myself and not others.

It's easy to forget that around here. Well, this is one step closer to that freedom I've been thirsting for.

Goal #1: Stay Genuine

Love,

Vivian

Flying solo is getting a bit old. Yes, I admit, I finally feel it.

-Stop worrying so much

-Don't ever forget

-Make peace with self, respect, stay optimistic, stop being so self-critical, love

and most importantly, STAY TRUE.